And the words raced through my brain, like memories from long ago, haunting everything. "Have some faith, you are strong."
But words are words. There is nothing there without action. So I hang my head now, for the things I have forgotten.
I am strong. I see strength when I look in the mirror. But there are days I forget. There are times we all forget, just how strong we really are. But we can't dwell on days lived. We can't let them paint us old as we regret where we slipped and fell. We push on and learn. We remember our past as our future will tend to repeat itself.. If we let it, we have learned nothing. If we can change it, well, then we can see our strength and growth.
Doubt destroys, faith fulfills. Pres. Monson said that. Why is it that I allow doubt to come in? Why is it that doubt can creep so easily and faith seems so much harder to grasp?
But on this side of the bridge I feel that doubt is nothing more than my fears. I can let them go. I can't see everything, true. Fog clouds my view here and there, but faith can carry me through it. I know that I will make it out. This path ends somewhere.
The sun still shines my friends. You can see it, you can feel it. So why worry? "I wonder all the time why worry?" Have a little faith! The sun has never given into the night, it rises still everyday without fail. Somedays a little dimmer than others but still it comes out. What makes you any different?
For all of you who ever doubted me, I can tell you now; I am living on my own. I am surviving all alone. and I am winning. I still know who I am. I have not forgotten.
My name is Janelle.
I suffer from depression. I have since I was 12. This blog is my outlet. My thoughts and ideas on how I handle everyday life. It is not a blog to have people feel sorry for me... actually most people I know don't know about this blog. This is just a place for me to express my thoughts in hopes that I can get better and be the best mom, wife, and friend that I can be.
Many people suffer from depression... maybe someone will read this things and learn something from me.
I am married to the most wonderful man I have ever met. It took me a while to find him, but he is worth everything i went through just to find him.
I am a member of the Church Of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I love my religion with all my heart.
I have a beautiful daughter whom I love dearly. She is my world.
I am so grateful for my Heavenly Father and his eternal plan. I am so glad that I have this life. I have had many trials and many more are sure to come but God will help me all the way